Wug Thoughts

Should’ve ordered printer paper yesterday.  Tried to, but was asked to hold off until R had gotten the company credit card figured out.  Apparently the owner put a purchase on it that was rather larger than he was supposed to.  I don’t envy her position at this company.  She’s got to put up with so much BS it makes my head hurt.  Yes the owner does have to listen to her, to a certain extent, but not as much as you might think.  Half the time he treats her like she’s staff and he’s the boss, which I couldn’t handle.

I’m stretching out my work again today to make it last.  R keeps trying to sit down with me and give me a better idea of my job description, but it just doesn’t seem to happen.  Seems like everybody here is busy but me, and I’m supposed to be.  I’d still rather be up here killing time than downstairs on the phones wanting to kill myself and/or the customers.  I’ve discovered in my time working here that Joe Blow Homeowner isn’t very smart. 

This is going to be a very long day.  It’s not quite 10am yet, and I’m already longing to go home.  Joys of Fridays.  I’m also going to run out of work today, so then there’s the joy of sitting around attempting to look busy so that no one will bother me.  

I just want to go home.  This weekend I’m going to clear out our bedroom, which I’ve been wanting to do for months.  I got a dresser this Tuesday, but just haven’t had the time and/or energy to clean out the room.  But I am DONE with living out of suitcases for a while.  After this weekend I will have a proper bedroom, in which I will be comfortable.

Sammy’s leaving this weekend for Lethbridge to see Marina.  Wonder how she’s doing.  Wonder if/when Sammy’s going to bring up the fact that he’s gay.

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It’s difficult for me to quantify what I’ve learned in the ethics portion of the learning circle so far.  Maybe it will be clearer after class on Monday, but so far I don’t feel that I’ve learned much at all.  Not as far as ethics go anyway.  I’ve put a lot of time and energy into developing my own personal ethics.  It’s been necessary for my mental health given my break from Christianity and the accompanying condemnation from my mother, whose respect carries great weight with me.  She’d be shocked to hear that statement, but it’s true. 

I could no longer continue as a Christian which she interpreted as no longer having any moral base or grounding.  I felt it was necessary to prove that I could still be a good person even though I turned my back on Christianity.  So over the years I’ve done quite a lot of reading and pondering the idea of ethics, what they are, where they come from, and examining different ideas of what constitutes ethical behavior. 

For me ethics boil down to respect.  Respect for myself and respect for others. 

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Ten minutes til lunch and I’m done all the work I have for the day.  I think I’ll spend the afternoon working on my accounting project.  Looks similar enough to the work I do here that I don’t think anyone will notice.  None of the guys have any idea what I do anyways, so as long as I look like I’m working on something, they’ll most likely leave me alone. 

Also managed to spill tea all down the front of my shirt.  Go me.  At least I had the sense to dress casually today. 

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I can’t exactly ignore the phone yet, but I can sit and watch it ring, and only have to pick it up if Leah’s busy with another call.  Someday I want a position where the phone can ring as much as it wants and it is not my problem.  I think after this job I will attempt to secure an assistant controller position somewhere, most likely in a hotel.  If Brian stays at the Delta for a couple of years, he’ll be able to transfer to any of their other properties which are all over Canada.  The company that bought Delta last year also owns the Fairmont chain, so he could probably work in one of those too if he wanted to.  A couple years in Calgary will probably be good for us, but we don’t want to stay here forever.  I’m so happy Brian finally got a job he likes though.  And I actually think he’ll stick with this one!  I get paid next Friday, and then he gets paid the week after.  At that rate we’ll be able to knock a big hole in our debt by the end of the year, and have it paid off by next summer.  It’s tough working cross-shifts, but that’s just how I know this arrangement isn’t too good to be true. 

I can’t get past the feeling that today is a massive waste of time. Since the guy came in to fix our phone issues, my computer can’t connect to the office server. This is unfortunate as all of my work depends on being connected to it. I can access the booking sheet from any other computer, which is why I’m currently camped at Blaine’s desk, but all my accounting stuff needs QuickBooks, and none of the other computers in the office have it installed. So I’m basically sitting here pretending to look busy while I wait for the phone guy to come back and fix the wiring he screwed up. Meanwhile my work is just sitting there, and the pile’s not getting any smaller.

It’s not like I’m overworked at the moment, but I do hate sitting around. Although, I’d rather be doing this than be stuck downstairs calling people for their fax numbers like Leah is right now. I love not being the receptionist anymore.

Soon it will be lunchtime and I will have accomplished virtually nothing. Hooray.

Well, that’s not entirely true. At least I got caught up on the invoices I forgot to make yesterday on account of getting Leah settled in downstairs. So tomorrow I will once again have two days worth of invoices to make. Oh well. Hopefully she will finish with the eternal faxing mission and I’ll be training her on phones by the end of the week. That’s mostly something you learn with practice.

Common calls she will get:

Hi, I’m getting my furnace installed next week and I’ve heard there’s grant money available if I get you guys to come check out my house beforehand. (in Edmonton, where we’re booking three weeks ahead. Good luck with that buddy.) Usually we’ll find a way to sneak in a pre-inspection of the furnace somewhere into our already overbooked schedule, and then book them for the rest of the inspection at a later date.

Hi, I installed a high efficiency furnace last year. Am I eligible for a grant for it? No.

But that’s stupid, why shouldn’t I get free money for what I’ve done? Hey man, I don’t make the rules. Here’s a number you can call if you want to try to challenge them. (give them the number for NRCan and wish them good luck, cause it ain’t gonna happen.)

Hi, I got my house assessed (however long ago), and I still haven’t got my report yet. Why haven’t I got it yet? Because we’re behind. There’s a very good chance of it going out within the next couple of weeks, however long ago you had it done, because we are slowly getting caught up. But being pissy about it will not result in you getting your report done earlier. If it’s one of Stephen’s, bug him about it and he’ll dig it up and get it done within a couple of days. But it will still probably be out in the next couple of weeks. Except for the ones that have already gone out. It’s always a good call to double check the mailing address and promise to send another copy. Sometimes they’ve got a legitimate complaint and sometimes they’re just indulging the human penchant for assholery, but either way we’ll get to it as soon as we can. No ma’am, you are not special. Get over it.

Hi, I live in (some tiny town a million miles from anywhere). When can you come assess my house? I have no fucking clue. We can’t afford to go on trips to remote locations unless we have at least three assessments to do in the day because otherwise we won’t be able to even cover our costs. Yes we administer a government program, but we are a private company and no we cannot drive for 6 hours to do one lone assessment.

Brian doesn’t understand why I’m so wound up about getting a dresser. I was excited cause I thought it was coming yesterday. Yes, having to go get it today sucks for him. So why the hell didn’t he go get it yesterday, hmmm? I guess I’m still bitter about the last three months of me hauling my ass out of bed to go to work, while he sat around at home playing Warcraft. I don’t think he understands how these things connect, but it makes it difficult to feel too terribly bad about it. Or when he sat around all day when I was at work when it would’ve made a helluva lot more sense for him to move all the stuff in our bedroom into the new place. Oh yeah, it’ll take like five minutes. Yeah right. There went my entire evening at home when I was planning to help clean out the old place. And then I get the guilt trip because he and Cam got stuck cleaning. Not bloodly likely. So maybe I’m justified in feeling put upon and maybe I’m not, but he can bloody well haul his ass out of bed and go pick up the damn dresser that he’s been promising me for weeks.

I don’t mind so much if he tells me flat out “No hun, I can’t get that done today because of (whatever).” But fuck do I hate it when he promises me he’s going to do something and then when it comes down to doing the unpleasant part (ie, getting out of bed at 7am like the rest of the world), he folds and puts it off til tomorrow. Forever tomorrow. I married a procrastinator. So did he, but I try to limit my procrastination to things that affect me personally. When I make him a promise, I keep to it.

This isn’t about the dresser at all. It’s about following through on what he says he’s going to do. If he doesn’t learn to keep his word when he says he’s going to do something, I’m going to get increasingly hostile about it. He also needs to learn to think before he speaks, and not promise me he’s going to do something until after he’s asssessed the probability of it actually getting done. I hate having to be the driving force behind -everything-.

Note to self: make & maintain list of all the things we’ve said we’re going to do as soon as we both get paid.